Jonathan Rand


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30-minute Play, Comedy


In the nursery rhyme criminal justice system, citizens are represented by two separate yet equally ridiculous groups: the nursery rhyme police who investigate nursery rhyme crime, and the nursery rhyme district attorneys who prosecute the nursery rhyme offenders. These are their stories.

Vital Stats

7 females, 12 males, 19 either

(14-81 actors possible: 6-80 females, 0-76 males)

Feel free to be flexible with gender. For instance, even though certain names or roles (e.g. Jack) might be assumed to be male, there’s usually no reason they can’t be played by anyone.

Production Notes:

It’s unnecessary to be familiar with the Law & Order television drama after which this play is modeled. Please resist the urge to sing any of the rhymes. All dialogue should be spoken.

See the Appendix for suggested doubling-casting and a rhyme guide.

Use any level of set, props, and costumes that fits your budget, but simplicity tends to be ideal. For instance, Bingo need not wear an elaborate dog costume, but instead maybe a dog nose, ears, and tail. Imagination can rule the day.


Jonathan Rand

Jonathan Rand is among the most popular contemporary playwrights writing today, his stage plays having been performed over 24,000 times in theaters across 65 countries.

According to an independent survey of American schools, Jonathan’s one-act comedy Check Please was the #1 most-produced short play every season for the last 16 years.

A four-time Heideman Award finalist, his work is published by Random House, Stage Partners, Playscripts, TRW Plays, Smith & Kraus, Dramatics magazine, and Macmilllan.

Jonathan is a graduate of the University of Pennsylvania, and hails from Jacksonville, Florida.... [FULL BIO]